Barack Obama is identified as Morgan Freeman from Mandela. All songs must compulsorily have white chicks dancing in skimpy clothes. Pakistan is the land of terrorists, corrupt politicians and guns. Leader of the Taliban looks like a doppelganger of Zach Galifianakis (the annoying fat and hairy guy from The Hangover movies). Sheep with RDX filled stomachs can be detonated via old Nokia phones. Writing about Welcome To Karachi seems a lot more hilarious and engaging than actually watching it. For those brave enough to venture across the border of warnings, into the theatre, there’s a no-holds-barred, leave-your-brains-behind kind of comedy on offer. If you think condescending Gujarati stereotypes are funny, this one’s sure to keep you in splits.The entire screenplay of Welcome To Karachi is a collection of gags. As for the story, two absolutely useless guys from Jamnagar, Gujarat, take a yacht out in the Arabian Sea. Bad weather sinks their ship and washes them on to the beach in Karachi. The two simpletons are embroiled in a cat and mouse chase with terrorists, gangsters, Pakistani intelligence, propaganda driven Ministers, hair-brained media and the worst airport security in the history of aviation. As a result, this Bill And Ted’s Excellent Adventure type of film, turns into a Dumb And Dumber wannabe. The set pieces, like the Argo inspired airport scene or the outrageous Taliban outfit in Waziristan, are marginally entertaining. But if you’re looking for an integrated piece of cinema, it’s not here. Heck, this one doesn’t even have a proper ending. It’s just left up in the air.A group of like-minded people or friends can sit with drinks and come up with a dozen situations where the dumb guys become unlikely heroes in seriously dramatic situations. The idea sounds exciting. Unfortunately, that alone doesn’t make a film. Like any piece of art, cinema and its accommodating nature for outrageous ideas, needs to be moderated. It needs to be formulated. You can’t just throw a dozen ideas into a big vessel over the fire. It’ll only cook up a potboiler. And yet, Welcome To Karachi misses even that mark. Almost all of it doesn’t make sense. It’s okay if it entertains, that’s the golden rule of commercial cinema. But that’s where you need ingenuity. Fresh ideas that surprise you. Sadly, Welcome To Karachi turns out to be a rejig of the same old slapstick and parody humour. Arshad Warsi and Jackky Bhagnani unluckily are caught on thin ice. Yes their comic timing is impeccable, but even good comedians need great lines. The actors give it their best shot, they make you laugh a few times, but rest of the way you have to deal with absurd plot developments. It’s like a law of nature, ironically it’s the bad films that invite the most critique on in-film logic. Stuff like, why were all the embassies in Karachi in the same street, how the hell could the terrorists just parade onto the Karachi airport runway, etc. Never mind, a white American girl playing a Pakistani intelligence officer. Or an American tank driver having British accent. The critique is quite simply, incidental. Welcome To Karachi is a madcap comedy. The likes where nothing makes sense but grown men act like retards and yet save the world. It’s hard to write a recommendation for such a brainless romp.
